Zombie Killers: Elephant’s Graveyard Blu-ray Review

     Actors: Billy Zane, Dee Wallace, Brian Anthony Wilson

Director: Harrison Smith

Format: Multiple Formats, Color, Widescreen, NTSC

Language: English

Number of discs: 1

Rated: NR (Not Rated)

Studio: ANCHOR BAY

Release Date: February 3, 2015

Run Time: 104 minutes

 

 

        Ever wonder what happened to Mischa Barton? Yeah, I didn’t think so. But just in case you wanted to know if she is still a terrible actress now that her youth and beauty cant be relied on, the answer is clear with every terrible line she delivers in this typically awful low budget zombie film. Barton fits right in, though her career is so pathetic that even her role in this piece of garbage is small and insignificant to the film’s plot. It almost feels as though she were merely crammed into a small role for the ability to add another former star to the credits. Make no mistake, Barton’s name plays more significance than her performance does in this poorly-made production.

 

        Zombie Killers: Elephant’s Graveyard is every bit as awful as the horrendous double title. In reality, this is just an awful rip-off of “The Walking Dead,” with terrible CGI effects and acting that comes off even more false. This doesn’t feel like a film that was anyone’s inspiration, as much as a hodgepodge of contrived elements meant to ensure success. This is apparent in the pandering sub-genre of zombies, terrible casting done in an attempt to attach the most recognizable (i.e., sellable) names, and sloppy CGI action that quickly becomes laughable. If only filmmaker B. Harrison Smith had embraced the camp elements, this might have been an amusing film to watch. Unfortunately, the writer/director doesn’t seem aware of his own shortcomings, approaching the material with deadly seriousness that destroys the film.

 

        As many awful aspects as there are in this piece of garbage cinema, from CGI zombie fish and deer to overly serious dialogue, it is lead actor Michael Kean who does the most damage to the production. Kean plays Ian Sommers, one of members of a militia protecting the town of Elwood from zombie encroachment. Not a word that comes from Kean’s mouth is believable, and it weighs the film down to have countless dramatic dialogue scenes with him in favor of horror. Then when the zombie action does occur, it is poorly constructed with bad effects. There is literally not a single reason to see this film, even with Billy Zane and Dee Wallace in the cast.

 

        The Blu-ray high definition presentation only highlights exactly how terrible the zombified CGI animals are, especially the fish being shot by an actress who can’t seem to make shooting a gun look believable either. The extras include three featurettes, including plenty of behind-the-scenes footage to show you how to make a movie this shitty. 

 

Entertainment Value: 2/10

Quality of Filmmaking: 1.5/10

Historical Significance:  0/10

Special Features: 3.5/10